“Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you.” Isaiah 49:15
I have harsh judgment for “runaway mamas”. You know the kind that abandon their children for their own selfish pursuits. We all know moms that have left their children; which is the extreme. Then there are the moms that stay with their kids but still can’t quite get a handle on meeting their children’s needs above their own. In my prideful, judgmental, even arrogant way, I speak so cruelly of any mom that does not put her children first and sacrifice her own wants and desires for those of her children.
Of course, my attitude is sin. It hit home to me just the other day. For some reason, (okay, sin!) I lost it over my boys playing instead of getting right to their chores. Sure they needed direction back to their priority; but I mean, I lost it, like I used to years ago. I am a mature and godly woman of God who would never stoop to shouting when disciplining. Go ahead, gag and puke, I’ll still be here when you get back.
I went to their Dad, after all they are his boys. This is what I said, “I am about to get in the car and just leave these boys to you.” You can believe that motivated him to get on them immediately! I am sure it is mostly because he cannot live without me and the fear that I may leave was just too much for him.
This morning those words and the feelings behind them are still haunting me. You see, there are many times I have daydreams of the good life. Going back to work so I can have more “me” time; driving to the beach every day so I can walk…alone; eating out any old time my stomach desires, and not at fast food joints! Spending the day, weekend, year shopping with the credit card at the mall not the thrift stores. Even just not having to homeschool, or live on a shoestring budget, or cook, clean and care for my beloved ones, day after day, year after year.
My calling is to serve my husband, children, and grandchildren. I love this life, truly I do. It is hard work and a full time job for sure; more than full time, double shifts most days. I know that I know that God has called me to this life’s purpose. I see it regularly in His Word. I really believe it is the calling of every mom; but that does not give me the right to judge harshly those that fail in a more public way than I do.
God never abandons His people. Never abandons them, ever. When you are His through His Son Jesus Christ, God says, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5
I, however, do leave and forsake. I abandon my children’s needs for my own. Whether it is through an angry outburst, or harsh words, by not listening to them, even by being an ungodly example to them; I fail in my responsibility to them every day.
I want to be accessible to the mom that is overwhelmed. Even more importantly, I need to be transparent. To be honest about my failings, my sins. There is no way I can offer encouragement to a mom that wants to run away if she thinks I never have those thoughts.
How do I keep from acting on the desire to leave and live the good life? How have I been a stay at home mom all these years? By reading the Bible every day, and by spending time praying for direction and strength. Not my own strengths, but God’s. On my own and in my strength alone I fail, every time. My pastor says it best, “The good you see in me is Jesus Christ. The bad is my sinful self.” God wants us to have all of His Son and the Holy Spirit that He has to offer us. There is more than enough of Him available to us to please Him and those we serve.
Dear Heavenly Father, wrap your loving arms around the mamas that want to please you as they serve their families. Strengthen them in You and through Your Son. Help them to be humble enough to ask for help when they need it. Tear down the walls of pride that keep them from admitting their weaknesses and talking to another godly mom about their failures. Keep those of us with more experience available to the young moms, and help us to continue in your ways. In the name of Jesus, Amen.